This is all just a game

Journal entry 8 May 2016

I have a problem whereby every morning at work I feel very stressed. I even have physical symptoms which I’m really sick of. So I’m going to tap in to Spirit to see if I can get some answers as to what’s happening:

Me: So many times over the years I’ve come in to work to an email that’s made me panic and spring into action. It seems this stress may be a learned response. But the past doesn’t exist so this can’t be.

HOLY SPIRIT: This is happening because you want it to happen, otherwise it wouldn’t be happening. Your mind is creating it because it wants it. Why do you want this? It’s proof of your suffering – “behold me, brother, at your hand I die.”1 It is accusatory – look what a victim you’ve made of me, see how I suffer. God, you don’t need to punish me, look how I punish myself.

Me: What would happen if work were easy and guilt-free, with no suffering? It would be boring, too easy, no challenge, there would be no point doing it. I have to keep the suffering to keep the interest. I don’t want to go to Heaven for the same reason – there would be no point to it – there would be no challenge, no learning, no growth…

HOLY SPIRIT: …and no pain, no suffering, no devastation, no turmoil, no misery, no tiredness, no illness and no injury – the ego lives for these things and wouldn’t exist without them. All the reasons for which you want to give up work you also want to keep it. You will never get home as long as you’re clinging to this, enjoying the suffering, as long as you see purpose in the suffering.

You don’t need to prove how much you suffer. Work can be enjoyable. You can learn and grow without suffering. This is all just a game and should be treated lightly – you can be as light as a feather. Suffering is an attack thought and you can escape from the world you see by giving up attack thoughts2 – thoughts of attacking others, thoughts of being attacked by others and thoughts of attacking yourself. You are attacking yourself trying to prove that you’re real. Withdraw all belief from the body and feel it become light. Walk lightly through life, barely touching the earth. Work is designed to confuse you, it’s designed to be challenging and to keep your interest so you remain constantly distracted and don’t allow God into any little gaps because there are none. Keeping you preoccupied with the body and the external world is a classic ego tactic. It’s a perfect solution to keep God out. How long, how long oh Son of God will you keep doing this? Will you retire at 75 only to then wither and die? Or will you become a body of light and allow yourself to be carried down a quiet path in summer?3

1 T-27.I.4

2 W-pI.23.1

3 T-14.IV.6

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